I Give

I Give

by Dana Harrell

To Ken, the love of my life

I give. I give up the days and nights of crying in my efforts to stop loving you and

my crazy thoughts that though we have love… we need more to succeed.

I give. I give up the idea that we must be the perfect couple if we are to survive…always doing and saying the right things and never having a disagreement.

I give. I give up the notion that everyone has to approve before I can claim to the world that we are a couple. 

I give. I give up needing to be right and instead, from now on I choose to be kind.

I give. I give up my belief that I am not worthy of the kind of love you have for me. From now on, I am humbled by your love for me but I will never again question or doubt it.

I give  you my heart. Please don’t break it.

I give  you my loyalty. Please never doubt it.

I give you my priorities. Please know you are my number one even when I am overwhelmed with life.

I give you my dreams. Please share them with me.

I give you my hopes. Please join yours with mine.

I give you my word….I am one with you for the rest of our lives. Please never shut me out.

I give you my love. Pure and unadulterated. Unconditional. Forever yours…. Please accept it.

Playing Pretend

My sweet little Princess Rutabaga,

Tonight, I feel compelled to write to you and tell you about a magic moment we shared two days ago. You see, you are only 21 months old right now and I am relatively sure you will not remember this, so I want to be sure you will be able to live it again...when you are old enough.

I was out of town most of the weekend. This week is camp DeDe at my house for Bubba, so when I got back in town Sunday evening, and even before I went home, I came to your house to get him. You saw me come in, and though you were buck naked and about to be put in the bath, you saw me and ran as fast as you could, jumping into my arms and laughing for joy. After a quick snuggle, you went back to daddy and the bath. He shut the door, but I heard you say my name several times.

In just a few minutes, Daddy took you out of the tub and after mommy dried you off, you ran to me and sat in my lap, saying, "De De" and laughing that sweet little laugh. We played and giggled and I rocked you while you played possum in my arms.

In about ten minutes, mommy left to go do something. About that time, you saw two cans of playdough on Bubba's bookshelf. You wanted me to open them, but I told you to ask mommy.You ran out to find her and when you both came back, she said "Not now". You picked up a paper bowl that Bubba had colored in and said "Paint." Next thing I knew, you were shaking the unopened cans of play dough over the bowl and Mommy told me that you thought there was paint in the cans.

I put my finger in the empty bowl and "painted" on your sweet little belly. "Pretty", I told you. You looked at me with a quizzical look and in a minute, you put your little finger in the empty bowl and painted on your own belly. "Pretty" I told you and we were launched into playing pretend. We painted your belly and your nose and you kept shaking the pretend paint into the bowl. The expression on your face was priceless, part confused, part delighted!

Mommy says that you think I am crazy, painting with something that is not there. I say, you and I saw the paint and we understand that playing pretend is one of the most fun things we can ever do. It was the first time you and I played in that fun, pretend world...but it most certainly won't be the last!